The unfair life of private school genius

Yes my dear followers, IF you haven’t figured it out already I am a genius stuck with the idiots. Now I know how Scar felt with the hyenas. 

So I have 8 days 10 hours and 32 minutes roughly until I graduate and leave the hell know as Catholic School (ironic right!). You know those teen homosexual videos on youtube about things getting better… well lets just say that doesn’t work for gifted minds like myself just LBGTs. 

Today I had my Pre-Calc exam and was freaking out. One the exam determined whether or not I graduated (procrastination/senioritus went into full virus mode at the end of 3rd quarter. I studied hard but then was placed the same table as the ultimate bitch (for short we will say UB).

UB has been riding my ass since freshman year when her boy toy took an interest in myself (hey who could resist this ;)) She tortured me all field hockey season and even advocated and unforgivably succeeded in taking my awards this season (AFTER 4 FUCKING YEARS ON VARSITY) away from myself. 

SO here I was trying to pass the 12th grade when the UB sits at my exam table (4 people to a table spread out in the gym). 

Of course her two minions follow and proceed to talk during the exam and cheat!!!! 

I HAVE A GREAT CONSCIOUS (despite what my religion teacher thinks). 

Then I ran out of battery in my calc…. kill me now. 

UB and her pets ruin my life and with 8 days to go I can’t wait to leave

Love, peace, and scandal,

Jenni from the suburbs

WHEN I’M ON DUTY AND IT THUNDERS

countryclublifeguardproblems:

WHEN YOU SEE YOU ARE SCHEDULED TO WORK ON THE 4TH OF JULY

countryclublifeguardproblems:

WHEN IT STARTS TO RAIN BUT DOESN’T THUNDER SO THE KIDS JUST STAY IN THE POOL THROUGH THE STORM

countryclublifeguardproblems:

that happened to me twice… I almost killed my supervisor last summer!! 

WHEN THEY HIRE A NEW GUARD OF THE OPPOSITE SEX

countryclublifeguardproblems:

How you hope it will be:

How it ends up:

WHEN YOU YELL AT A KID FOR BREAKING A RULE AND THEIR MOM APPROVES OF THEIR BEHAVIOR

countryclublifeguardproblems:

It’s like: 

WHEN YOU GET HIT ON BY A GUEST

countryclublifeguardproblems:

I love when they do it at the top of slides with like 50 ft drops :) try it again bitch

When my friends leave me with the popular girls in class

AFTER I PUT A KID IN A TIME-OUT

countryclublifeguardproblems:

WHEN SOMEONE ACTUALLY NEEDS YOU TO UTILIZE YOUR FIRST AID SKILLS

countryclublifeguardproblems:

no when someone uses the bathroom in the pool is more appropriate 

lifeguardproblems:

vas-happenin-larry:

armyofgregs:

WHAT THE FUCK HAHA

^WHAT. THE. FUCK

I know I never reblog stuff like this on this blog, but hey, it’s water/pool related, so why not…

And fellow lifeguards, just be happy this will probably never ever happen in your pool. And if by some miracle of defying gravity it does, well, your shift will be a heck of a lot more entertaining.

this is the only way my schools team would win ever…